The Mayonnaise Jar and 2 Cups Of Coffee
When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 Hours in a day is not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.
A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous "yes."
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.
"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - God, family, children, health, friends, and favorite passions -- things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car. The sand is everything else -- the small stuff.
"If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.
So...
Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.
"Take care of the golf balls first -- the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."
One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked ." It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."
About Peace (posted 1/18/08)
During the last several years of my life, I have had many challenges, one could even say things were out of control. This was new for me, as up until now, I have lead a pretty good life. So for Christmas I purchased my husband John, a book entitled, “About Peace" (108 ways to be at peace when things are out of control)... as both of our lives have been out of control these past years. Of course I read it before he had a chance. The author is Scott Shaw, and I have read nothing else written by him, but I did want to share with you some of the 108 ways to be at peace that touched me: 1) If someone says something to you, if it is true listen to it, if it is not true, discard it (I have a really hard time doing this). 2) Some people can make you feel guilty or saddened for not delivering to them what they feel they deserve. You can only give what you can give. (This I know, but I still feel guilty as I would like to deliver to all what they feel they deserve - I just know I can never do it all.) 3) Just because you are in a relationship with someone, who says you have to associate with them if they are not nice to you? ( I could not agree with this more). 4) Whenever you find yourself in a non-peaceful place or a non-peaceful situation takes control over your life, leave it. Forget the excuses and justifications - just leave it. 5) People love to complain, people love to blame (I know I do). Stop doing this and you will find greater peace. (This is a hard one to work on.) 6) Criticizing others makes some people feel momentarily empowered. Do not let the false criticisms of others affect your peace. Individuals who envy you often insult your integrity to make you feel defensive. Defensiveness makes you say things you do not mean, perform actions you did not intend. No matter what the motivation for their misguided attitude, if they shift you from your axis of peace they will have achieved their shortsighted goal - control over your emotions. How do remain unswayed by the accusations of another? Know yourself. Be yourself. Be proud of yourself. Understand that you are the best you can be, doing the best you can do. (This is another one really hard to do. If I am already the best I can be, does that mean I cannot get better???) Either way Scott states that the best defense is peace and silence. (Impossible for me!!) 7) We all make mistakes. We all do things, say things, that we wish we had not. Everybody knows this. Yet, virtually everyone dwells on the consequences of their mistakes, completely robbing themselves of peace. You can hold on to the memories of your mistakes and wallow in them. Or, you can see what you mistakenly did or said and move on. One path leads to peace; the other does not. (My husband is much, much better at this than me...in fact I even dwell on his mistakes as well as mine, I guess I just need to learn to let things go.) I would love to know what those of you reading this think, and would love to know how you attempt to be at peace when things are out of control. Thanks - Peace.
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