Excerpt from: The Jewish Press (click for full article)
There has been much made in the media about the stress on marriage and the high rates of divorce affecting couples who have a child with a developmental disability. Yet at the same time, counter studies have been published that refute many of these claims – reporting that this data has been exaggerated and that these families do not have a significantly higher divorce rate.
Which of these assertions is true?
In our experience working with families, we can certainly understand both perspectives.
There is undoubtedly an inordinate amount of stress placed on a marriage when a child has a disability, and we have seen marriages unravel before our eyes due to complications and stress that simply can’t be managed. When this happens, the consequences of divorce can be enormous and exponential: the financial pressures, stress of single-parent caregiving, impact on the child with a disability who has an even harder time managing change; as well as effects on the typically developing children who are already coping with having a sibling with special needs.
Yet we have also seen couples who parent a child with a disability with marriages that are incredibly strong: couples who “have each other’s backs,” who understand the unique pressures they each face and provide support to one another as they meet them. We have seen couples with an extraordinary level of emotional closeness that is fostered by the all-encompassing challenge that is caring for a child with special needs.
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